Why I’m Aiming for an “Imperfectly Perfect” Lent

On this eve of Ash Wednesday, it feels like Lent is already here and I am a little empty and coming up short.

My lack of progress in choosing my Lenten sacrifices proves that I am right on track for an imperfect Lenten season.

I still am unclear on what I am doing or giving up during these 40 long days in the desert to deepen my relationship with Christ.

I am asking myself, will I truly put aside my wants, needs, and desires to focus completely on making space for Jesus? Will I focus on his wants, needs, and desires of me?

I want this Lenten season to be different. I tend to start the season off strong, then find myself giving in to distractions, temptations, and weaknesses. Sometimes, I admit, I feel like giving up and many times I have.

Instead of going down that path, God willing, I am going to focus on being "imperfectly perfect", lowering my standards so I can reach the perfection that God has in store for me.

Let me restate that last part…I am going to focus on being “imperfectly perfect”, lowering MY standards so I can reach the perfection that GOD has in store for me.

As a notorious perfectionist, I fully acknowledge that my ideas and plans do not always align with God’s will or timing.

Society’s idea of what perfection is has taken a hold of me from a very young age, and that’s a hard habit to break.

Maybe you do this, too. To avoid failure and mistakes, and ensure everything goes according to the plan, I have become a “preplanner”—one who likes to get ahead of things by making plans before actually making the plan to make sure the plan goes according to plan (um, what?).

To put it simply, I find it hard to give up control and “let go and let God”.  

“For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” (Jer 29:11)

I find that when I finally let go, give in, and trust God, I am open and obedient as long as things are going in the right direction (again, according to my perception, not necessarily his).

Many times I find myself questioning the order and steps he chooses for me along the way. When doubt creeps in, I start the process of preplanning, planning, and checking to see if the plan is going according to plan all over again (sound familiar?).

This Lent, I am going to start by renouncing what the world (and myself) tells me is perfect, and focus instead on what God is telling me.

Through faithful prayer and discernment, he will point me in the right direction that always leads to truth, beauty, and goodness. Not just an attractive false perception that gets me off track.

I have to choose to be “imperfectly perfect”, allowing God to use my weaknesses and imperfections to become more like him.

Less of me, more of him.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Cor 12:9)

It’s true that the light and love of Christ can only enter inside our souls if we are broken, cracked, willing and open to fully receive him.

We have to listen to his voice and prayerfully discern what he is calling us to do. This means each day and in every moment, we step out in trust and faith.

This means moving ourselves and the world aside and making space in our lives for Christ.

That is what Lent is all about—perfecting our relationship with Jesus to fully receive the grace and gifts that he lovingly and freely offers to us.

Only then can we bring his gift of love back to others that so desperately need to know him. And we do this however we are called as his disciples and apostles, to be sent to proclaim him through our words and deeds.

While I still need to prayerfully search my heart and discern what Lenten sacrifices God is calling me to offer up to Christ this season to get closer to him, I feel renewed.

I understand that I need to truly let go and let God, and not just say the words. Truthfully mean them and fully live them.

I am going to ask Jesus to move into the driver’s seat and be ok with my role as passenger along for the ride. 

To be honest, I actually feel relieved, a sense of freedom knowing that being “imperfectly perfect” is perfectly OK and actually a good thing in God’s eyes. Whew!

I won’t worry so much about my “accomplishments” during Lent, but rather focus on how I can find new ways to encounter Christ each day and become more like him. Then, and only then, can I possibly bring his authentic and generous love to those he puts into my path each day.

Brothers and Sisters, may we leave it up to Jesus to do the impossible with our lives during the next 40 days as we walk alongside him in the desert. May we follow his good and holy will, and not get ahead of him with our own plans.

“For with God nothing will be impossible.” (Lk 1:37)

Jesus, take the wheel!!

In Christ, Kerry Anne McGuire

P.S. To learn more about the efforts of fellow Brothers and Sisters in Christ in Houston, TX, that are aiming to bring the perfect love of Jesus to others, go to lovingstonesofchrist.org. Join us!